Riding the Wave ... And the Trough

I am mentally ill, diagnosed with Bipolar Disorder I, OCD, ADHD, PTSD and a vitamin B12 deficiency (a key element in brain development). For over 12 years, I took anywhere from 5-8 psychotropic meds each day, and have been recently giving myself a monthly injection of B12.

In January 2012 I was hospitalized for depression, and management of my currrent med cocktail. Immediately all but two of my meds were discontinued and, after a few weeks of adjustment, and some near hospitalizations, things seem to be going much better.

I have been on permanent disability since January 2010, and am adjusting to life on a very limited income.

My prayer is that in walking with me during the ups and downs of Bipolar Disorder, you might find solace, and benefit through my experiences.

Tuesday, February 19, 2008

The Random Punch of ECT

Here we go again!

Two and one-half years ago I had two ECT treatments. My BiPo was way out of whack, and my pDoc thought this would help. So off I went on a brand new adventure. If you have had ECT, let me tell you, I guarantee that it isn't like anything else you've ever experienced.

In my case, I was led into a mini-surgical room, and lay down on an exam table. (Note: Keep in mind, one possible side effect of this treatment is memory loss. So the experience I am sharing with you might be true, made up or a combination of random memories. I'll share, and you decide.)

An IV is set up, electrodes are placed on your temples and they administer a drug that makes you sleep for about 10 minutes. At this point, I am asleep, so I don't know what happens ... I think it has something to do with a queen, a rabbit, a young girl and a deep, deep hole. Just kidding. They place a rubber block between your teeth to keep you from biting your tongue, because the purpose of the treatment is to cause a seizure.

Within 20 minutes you wake up in a recovery room, usually confused and experiencing a feeling that has to be experienced. In my experience it was as if my perception of my surroundings had increased 10 fold, and everything had come alive. Then the next thing I knew it was morning. I remembered a few fleeting images of the day, but the 20 hours or so after the treatment just vanished. Also some of my memories disappeared as well. Things that had happened over the past few years were randomly erased.

Was it worth it? Hell yes! That is why I will begin another round in a few weeks. I will probably do one every week or so, and see what results. I'll keep you posted.


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