My wife had to work all day, so I cleaned around the house some, and then came on into church. I have been here since 2:00, mostly brooding about being here. I want to spend Christmas Eve with my wife ... in our home ... doing the things we like to do. But I'm here, and she's there, 32 miles away.
If you have been following my blog, then you are aware that I have had a great deal of trouble with a small number or parishioners. Today I discover that one member of the church whom I just knew was supportive IS NOT. They've been talking behind my back about getting rid of me, and it makes me sick to my stomach. What is it about being up front and honest that eludes these people?
"If your brother sins against you, go and tell him his fault, between you and him alone. If he listens to you, you have gained your brother. But if he does not listen, take one or two others along with you, that every word may be confirmed by the evidence of two or three witnesses. If he refuses to listen to them, tell it to the church; and if he refuses to listen even to the church, let him be to you as a Gentile and a tax collector. Truly, I say to you, whatever you bind on earth shall be bound in heaven, and whatever you loose on earth shall be loosed in heaven." (Matthew 18:15-18 RSV)
As a Christian we must always strive to follow the commands of Jesus. Granted this is one of the most difficult things to do, but we should at least head in that direction. Our job in this world is not to tear down, but build up. I abhor the way people treat each other. What I really HATE is the way people treat each other behind their back.
I am nearing the end of my last thread. I am tired. I am sad. I am sick. I am lost. I am weak. My heart aches. My head spins. My time in the desert is long, lonely and threatening.