A Long Time Coming
and
A Long Time Being
After 18 years of illness (and still counting), nearly 20 different medication cocktails, 121 psychologist and over 175 therapst visits; after multiple ECT treatments, numerous cuts, stabs and various types of destructive behavior; after thousands of dollars wasted, many missed business opportunities and a lifetime of pretendiing and making excuses; after all this, it’s finally official. I have been officially designated disabled by the United Methodist Church.
People can now know who I really am. They might finally understand why I act a little “different” from time to time; they might realize why I did what I did when I did what I did. I no longer have to hide behind a fascade of excuses and lies. There's no stopping me now. I can sing at the top of my lungs, "I am mentally ill! I am mentally ill!" There is nothing that can hold me back now. I am part of a group that works tirelessly to erase the stigma of mental illness, so it's no longer an obstacle.
Mental illness becomes a non-issue,
I’m finally free ........ or am I?
Next we’ll examine what happens when the pressure of hiding your illness is over. Will it really be better than before?
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